Seattle Space Needle Reflection at Night

Capitol Hill’s New Body-Shaming Statue

Donald Trump Statue on Capitol Hill

You know, I’ve never heard anyone call fauxgressives brave, and if this statue deep in “Amen Territory” is any indication, I’m not going to hear it for some time.

Yes, Donald Trump is evil incarnate. We know this because the wealthy elitists in media, politics, and academia tell us so. Especially those elitists who share a political party with none other than the venerable Ku Klux Klan.

It is these very bastions of ethics, not to mention their gentrifying offspring, who inform us that it is uncool … so very, very uncool to be a Trump supporter in 2016. Why, it’s the domain of trailer trash it is. You know, those trolls too unfortunate to get a free ride to UW, instead have to risk dodging bullets in the military. Hahahah, silly poors. You poor, uneducated poors! My GOD you’re so ignorant! I bet you didn’t even get the cool professors in … right, we already covered that, you didn’t go to college. POORS! You’re not cool like the gentrifying class. You know, us cool kids who walk around shouting “Black Lives Matter” as we’re busy gentrifying every black life we can find out of Seattle. Yeah, the cool is ours, baby, and you can’t have it.

The proletariat is L-A-M-E. (but we still love Kurt Cobain, though, cause he’s cool since killing himself)

Trump, however, is so uncool, in fact, so uncool that the very notion of supporting his candidacy is enough to earn one a lifetime of Twitter-shaming.

Why?

Because diversity and tolerance are good things, that’s why!

It’s best not to question the logic. Trust me on this one. The fauxgressives can outspend you and me, so trust me, nobody is going to challenge them on anything.

Anyway, there’s a new statue of Donald Trump on Capitol Hill, and it makes fun of his 70 year-old body … big belly, small penis, flabby butt, and all.  Which as we all know, is a bad thing to do. We know, because the people who put up this statue told us that body-shaming was wrong.  Unless you belong to the correct corporate political party, in which case, body-shaming is good.  Because we’re all equal, although not really, but let’s just say we’re all equal when someone asks because it’ll get us a big ‘ol pat on the head from the elites, as the fair-haired maidens from Upper Caucasia look on with approval.   Man, it feels good to get affirmation.  So good.  I just wanna go outside right now and say something that enjoys near-universal approval so that I can bask in the insincere admiration of my peers.  It’s fucking addictive it is.  Just lights up my mesolimbic reward pathway like the Rockefeller Center Christmas Tree.   Just parrot the party line and *BAM*, instant approval. Not a shred of risk involved. Not a spec of sacrifice. My GOD I want to be part of the herd so bad I can taste it!  Validate me.  VALIDATE ME DAMMIT!  Look, Trump has a tiny pecker!  Ha ha, you tiny peckered fat ugly old fuck!  Look at the tiny peckered old fuck!  See, I’m cool like you!  I’m cool just like you!!!

*sigh* This whole thing would be funny if it weren’t 100% fucking accurate.

Seattle 2016: Where original, independent, free thought comes to die a hideous, horrible death, and is buried in a shallow grave right next to tolerance, diversity, and the mangled-beyond-recognition corpse of sincerity.

Tuition well-spent, Mom and Dad, tuition well-spent.

Vote corrupt psycopath in November!

Donald Trump Statue on Capitol Hill

Donald Trump Statue on Capitol Hill

Capitol Hill Trump Statue

2 comments to Capitol Hill’s New Body-Shaming Statue

  • Nate

    Fuck trump! He deserves what he is getting and more. He is a vile piece of excrement.

    • Fair enough. Now do Hillary. What would you consider her to be?

      Say what you will about Trump, but when the best the opposition can come up with is Hillary Clinton, I’d say the moral high-ground is duly ceded. Ceded, pissed on, then imploded.

      Do you really think that she’s not everything Trump is, and worse? Do you not think she’s just the better liar and politician with better handlers?

      Do you honestly and truly think there’s a group of people she wouldn’t have thrown in a wood chipper if it meant her own ascension to power?

      Trump may be crass, rude, and pretty out there, but he never defended a child rapist while ridiculing the child. At least not that I know of.

      Hillary Clinton supporters lack the moral capital to criticize anyone I’m afraid, and while what you say about Trump may be true, well, it also gives a free pass to a woman that even members of her own party largely agree is a psychopath.

      It’s another election of stupid vs. evil.

      I’m not sure how much better one is than the other.

      Not to mention, hating Donald Trump, in an area of the country where hating Donald Trump is status-quo, holds little appeal for me personally. It’s not like Washington State is at risk of going for Trump, so what’s the point? The approval of the pathological hypocrites? Thanks, but no thanks.

      I’m pretty sure we’ll get the elitist psychopath, and I’m pretty sure all of the people who think they’re “alternative” and oh-so quirky, different, and original will vote for her.

      Dog bites man. Film at 11. *shrug*

Leave a Reply

You can use these HTML tags

<a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <s> <strike> <strong>