Seattle Space Needle Reflection at Night

Guns N’ Roses at Seattle Taxpayer Stadium

Guns N' Roses at Seattle Taxpayer Stadium

And they said it would never happen …

At least not in this lifetime.

Heh.

Sorry.

Looking back on the 200+ concerts I’ve been over the course of my lifetime, it would be hard to declare a “best”. After all, they’ve all been so different. And while there have certainly been smaller shows in distant years that have been more meaningful … Nirvana at the Off-Ramp, for instance … I’m hard-pressed to recall a more entertaining show, a more spectacular show, a more awesome show than Guns N’ Roses at Seattle Taxpayer Stadium on Friday night. (Yes, Century Stink,

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Alice in Chains? Yeah, Right!

Paramount Neon Sign and Marquee

When I got tickets to Alice in Chains a few weeks ago, I was excited, yet a little scared. After all, I’ve never seen a bondage show before. I’m pretty vanilla when it comes to that stuff, and I wasn’t quite sure what to expect.

When the house lights dimmed moments before the show, I didn’t know what I was personally supposed to do either. I mean, do we whip it out right away, do we watch for awhile and then do so, do we wait for the money shot? Who knew?

You can imagine my surprise when

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Smashing Pumpkins at the Paramount Theater

Smashing Pumpkins on Paramount Marquee

The Smashing Pumpkins played the Paramount last Wednesday night. After opener Liz Phair did her thing, Corgan began the show with a string of mostly-acoustic-ish (solo acoustic through a fairly large PA system) songs, then segued into some fully-electric songs, back to acoustic-ish, back to electric, back to acoustic-ish, etc, etc. The rest of the band came and went throughout the gig, depending on whether the song was a band or solo number.

When all was said and done, it was maybe 40% traditional rock, 60% quasi-acoustic, all kind of mixed together. I’ve never seen anything completely like it,

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A Funny Thing Happened on My Way Home from Work

Adam Sandler, Norm McDonald, David Spade, Rob Schneider, Tim Meadows, Nick Swardson, and Right-Said-Ed Vedder cover the Who's "My Generation"

I was walking home from work on Tuesday night when some guy sauntered up beside me and said “Pssst, you need tickets?”

“No”, I replied, before looking up at the nearby Paramount Theater marquee to see who I was being offered tickets to see. Adam Sandler, Rob Schneider, David Spade, Norm McDonald (and Tim Meadows and Nick Swardson, I would find out once in the venue).

The show was starting in a half-hour, and I didn’t hold out much hope for ticket availability, so imagine my surprise when I walked up to the box office and learned that they

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Camper and Cracker at The Crocodile Cafe

Johnny Hickman's Vaporization. May he Rest in Peace.

The Crocodile Cafe’s, uh, excuse me, The Crocodile’s (because “cafe” is passe’) lighting technician claimed another victim on Friday night.

Cracker had just taken the stage after opening act Camper Van Beethoven’s set, when without warning, the tech aimed not one, but two high-powered spotlights at the guitarist, instantly vaporizing him.

As the panic-stricken crowd raced for the door, front man David Lowery, summoning nearly 30 years of audience-savvy, declared “damn the set list, we must play a hit to regain control of the crowd!”, at which point, he launched into the opening bars of 1993’s “Low”.

It was

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Live at the Market: Screaming Pearl Gunhoney

Screaming Pearl Gunhoney Play Stooges Pike Market Rooftop Benefi

Oh sure, it’s been done before, from the Beatles to Bono, but it was only a matter of time before Seattle took its turn.

FREE CONCERT ON THE ROOF OF PIKE PLACE MARKET Sunday, August 23, 2015 7:00 p.m.

Music lovers will soon be able to enjoy year-round, exclusive live performances both inside and outdoors at KEXP’s New Home at Seattle Center — but we’re still building it. In anticipation of the extraordinary shows to come in the New Home, on Sunday, August 23 at 7:00 p.m., KEXP hosts RAW POWER KEXP, a one-of-a-kind FREE concert at another local

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Whitefest 2014

Figgy Pudding 2014

Alas, the annual Figgy Pudding Festival, highest holy day on the White Bourgeoisie calendar, went off on Friday without a hitch. Cops were everywhere, and there was not a single, solitary mohawk in sight. Woo-Hoo!

Why is Figgy Pudding so special to upper-middle-class whites and the upper-middle-class whites at heart (Asian girls I’m looking at you)?

Are you kidding?

Singing Christmas carols, on the downtown streets of a major city, to benefit the homeless, while the homeless are kept far, far away?

We’re talking urban adventure without the risk, an audience of thousands watching you sing like Whitney, and

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Fuck You Dave

Dave Grohl Hates the Working Class

Hey Dave, thanks a lot.

Thanks for selling tickets to a surprise show at 3pm on a workday.

As a 45 year-old dude with a lot of non-famous friends, one would think you’d be wise to the realities of the post-great-recession American man. You know, those tragically unhip hate-targets who bust their asses to support families, and probably represent far more of your fanbase than the current crop of staycation Seattleites, doggy daddies, trust funders, and perpetual students.

Despite this, they’re not even worthy of a fair shot at a couple of show tickets?

Really?

Well, alright then. I

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That Quirky Portland

Portland is Now

Portland. A place so pretentious, that people come to Seattle for authenticity.

Portland used to be cool. Then, as the wage gap widened over the past decade, the offspring of the wealthy moved in, kicked the cool out, and before you knew it, the town was flooded with vinegar and water.

Now, you can’t walk down a Portland street without being beaten over the head by manufactured quirkiness.

“Look everyone, that guy is riding a unicycle, isn’t he quirky?”

“Look everyone, that girl has a donut-sized ear piercing, isn’t she quirky?”

Call me crazy, but Portland was way

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Breakin’, Boogaloo Shrimp, White People, and Hip-Hop History at EMP

Boogaloo Shrimp at EMP

From a musical perspective, I’ve lived through interesting times. Although I was but a child during some of them, I’ve been alive to witness the birth, or early years at the very least, of such diverse genres as heavy metal, progressive rock, funk, glam, disco, punk, hardcore punk, hip-hop, new wave, electronic, house, dubstep, trip-hop, noise/grunge/alternative, and whatever the fuck the last 15 years have given us (shit?).

I’ve witnessed the rise of a few of these genres first-hand, most notably hip-hop, hardcore punk, alt/”grunge”, and a regional music genre known as “Go-Go”. The latter is a genre which

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