Summer has arrived, and you know how I know?
Is it the warm weather?
Nope, we topped out in the mid 50′s this week.
Is it the abundant sunshine?
No, it’s rained all week.
Have a bunch of naked guys been riding around Downtown Seattle on bikes, wieners flapping in the breeze for all to see?
Nope, the Gay Pride parade is two weeks away (and don’t you DARE call them perverts).
You see, the reason I know that it’s summer, is because this goddamn thing has become a fixture outside of my window:
Every 10 minutes the GEICO Lizard stares through my window, before disappearing behind the skyscrapers of lower Downtown … until it reappears once again.
It still amazes me that, in a city which doesn’t allow building names to be displayed on the tops of its structures for fear of ruining the skyline, it’s still okay to drag a gigantic lizard back and forth across that very same skyline. In the final approach path of Boeing Field no less.
It was because of this giant lizard pissing all over my beloved skyline that I cancelled my insurance with GEICO last year.
And this is where you come in …
If you’ve ever wanted to do me a personal favor, and really, who hasn’t … please consider switching from GEICO as well. When they ask you why, tell them “Because your dumb fucking lizard is ruining Rex’s view.”
I’m completely serious. Pick up the phone right now and tell them. The number is 1-800-861-8360. Together, we can make a difference.
Thank you, and godspeed.