Seattle Space Needle Reflection at Night

The Honeycaust?

An outspoken woman in Seattle?  Complaining about a perceived imperfection in her extraordinarily-privleged 3%er life?  Why, that doesn’t sound right.  No, that doesn’t sound right at all.  That only always happens!

There’s a point in most moral panics where, emboldened by the cowardice of the populace and complicity of the media, said panic crosses the threshold from vaguely-theoretically-possible, to outright parody.  A point where all but the most mentally enslaved exclaim “Oh come on, this is just too much!”, either verbally or in their own minds.  The point at which the moral panic, to borrow a phrase, jumps the proverbial shark.

Alas, said time has finally come for the always-questionable, sometimes-amusing, “War on Affluent Women”.  An article has finally been published which has, so far, elicited at least one face-palm or groan from everyone I’ve ask to read it.

Said article is here: Seattle Actress Keiko Green Reflects On Success As A Non-White Player

In the article, a woman who is paler than I am, paler than most anyone who isn’t a snowman, claims that she is discriminated against because of the color of her skin.

The, uh, color of her skin.

Go ahead, I’ll wait. No, really, it’s okay, go ahead.

Alright, done holding your hand up to the monitor and matching skin tones? I know, right? God help you if you’ve been outside anytime in the last two weeks. You’re basically Wesley Snipes compared to this “woman of color”.

Not surprisingly, said “colored” woman hails from Atlanta, attended NYU’s Tisch School of the Arts, and now lives in Seattle. Why, it’s practically the Chitlin’ Circuit. And, of course, this is a woman who insists, absolutely insists, that she’s a near-constant victim of discrimination.

Perhaps the only thing not surprising about the article is the way KPLU practically douches itself with the story.

“I didn’t get the role, and it’s obviously because of my skin color!”

*Sigh* Young attractive women.  Will they ever get a break?  Will they ever get their fair share?

In a society which places paramount value on the translucent, homely, and most of all … poor … how can we expect those burdened with money, youth, looks, and an opaque epidermal layer to create any kind of life for themselves?

I submit to you that we cannot.

Folks, I say the bigotry ends here.  Please join me in saying “no more” to the richwhitehotists of this city.

It won’t be easy.  Then again, nothing worth doing ever is.  Black folks, the homeless, and the real attention whores … starving African children, have gotten so used to getting their way, that you can surely expect them to pound their meat hands at the mere suggestion that we give moneyed, attractive, pale women a seat at the table. They’ll just have to get over it, though.

The entertainment industry has far too long looked the other way as attractive woman after attractive woman have been passed over in favor of a hideous person of (some) color.  Movie after movie, and television show after television show has become such a hideous opaque-fest, that I no longer even bother.   If I can’t see people whiter than myself in key roles, I just don’t find it entertaining.

So join me, won’t you? Join me in finally participating in affirmative action. I urge each and every one of you out there to start showing a preference toward young, affluent, attractive women. Start showing them more attention, give them preference in hiring, hell, starting dating young, affluent attractive women. Not only will your penis thank you for it, you can explain your shallowness away to all critics as the answer to a higher calling. Social justice if you will.

With your help, the young, attractive, affluent, and, well, let’s just say white, women of this country will no longer be cast aside as undesirable by our society.

As for you dark-skinned, overweight, troglodytes out there … well, I hope you enjoyed the favoritism, because it’s about to come to an end.

Far be it from me not to appreciate a good parody.


1 comment to The Honeycaust?

Leave a Reply

You can use these HTML tags

<a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <s> <strike> <strong>