For as long as I can remember, I’ve been a supporter of gay rights. I’ve voted, marched, donated, volunteered, and tried to reason with those who I felt were honestly misguided.
It is with a heavy heart that I sit here now and realize that I was wrong. Not just wrong, but in many ways, I feel that I was a tool. Used by the “LGBT Community”, and then cast aside once the outcasts became fashionable.
Although it may seem sudden, the awakening has really been a long time in the making. The Space Needle flag controversy, the death threats for questioning what speedo-clad men have to do with gay pride … the bigotry, hate, and bullying I’ve seen spewed forth by “the community” has vastly exceeded that which I’ve seen from the opposition lately.
Finally, last night, while reading the Stranger, the realization came down on me like a ton of bricks. I finally realized that the gay marriage bill had nothing to do with fairness. Nothing to do with love. Nothing to do with civil rights. I realized that I had, in essense, been had. I’d been took. Lied to. Run amok. Led astray. Hoodwinked. Bamboozled.
I direct you to this article, which was the turning point for yours truly. It was to be, the final straw:
http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/paying-for-hate-monthly/Content?oid=14723222
Basically, an anonymous Capitol Hill tenant has accused a non-anonymous Capitol Hill landlord of belonging to a “hate group”. A pretty serious charge. A pretty cowardly charge, given that the accuser doesn’t even want to be identified.
Since the anonymous tenant happens to be gay, both the Stranger and the LGBT “community” has taken the side of the tenant, parroting the “hate group member” mantra, and even going so far as to claim that Capitol Hill is “their” neighborhood.
When I read that line, I had flashbacks to films of 1960′s Atlanta where the Klan claimed “their state” as a nigger-free zone. In 2012, like the Klan, the LGBT “community” now lays claim to the entirety of Capitol Hill as an area completely bereft of true tolerance. No opposing viewpoints allowed without ostracization.
Well, that’s all I can stands, I can’t stands no more.
Folks, I’m sick and tired of fake-tolerant people calling all who oppose them “hate groups”. I’m sick of these privileged cowards turning into bullies as soon as they get the slightest taste of political clout … as soon as they outnumber their opponents.
The Washington State LGBT Community. I have never in my life seen such a vile, disgusting, bigoted, cowardly, intolerant group of people in all of my years on this earth.
They’re bullies, and they’re cowards. They’re just as bad as those they claim to have been oppressed by. Actually, worse.
Why worse?
Because the pampered people of Capitol Hill should know better.
The Seattle LGBT Community claims to know oppression. They claim to know ostracization. They claim to be sensitive to the needs of the human psyche. They preach tolerance, and they promote diversity.
Yes, as soon as they encounter someone, anyone, with a different opinion than their own … they show themselves to be the same small-minded bigots from whom they’ve ostensibly escaped.
Worse still is the fact that the Seattle LGBT Community, on average, is far more affluent, and better educated than their queer-hating counterparts. Yet, all of that money, all of that knowledge, all of that education is squandered as the LGBT Community trots out the same fear-mongering campaigns that we’ve come to expect from places like the Westboro Baptist Church.
The redneck trailer-dwellers were kept sheltered. They were raised that way. LGBT Community, what’s your excuse?
For the sake of curiosity, I surfed over to the “Preserve Marriage Washington” website, just to see how big of a “hate” group they really were.
While there, I came upon this painfully sad, yet 100% true paragraph:
“Those who do not agree with this new definition of marriage as a genderless institution existing for the benefit of adults will be treated under the law just like racists and bigots, and will be punished for their beliefs.”
Sound familiar? Boy, did they nail that one or what? It sounds a lot like the reason I marched for gay rights in the 90′s and 00′s. It sounds like the reason I’ll never march for them again.
Not that they need it anymore. Now that the LGBT Community has gone mainstream, they’ve made it crystal clear that they don’t need people like me anymore. They’ve got celebrities on their side now. They’ve got politicians. They have TV shows and public service announements. They don’t need my stinking support. Now that the brass ring is in sight, the herd cares not who they trample upon to grab it. You know, for “love”.
Alas, I didn’t even get so much as a “thanks for your service”. Not even a “smell you later”.
Now that I’ve seen the movement for the intolerant machine that it’s become, no doubt, I’ll be called a hate-monger too.
Well, so be it. I’ll never embrace intolerance simply to be called tolerant. I’ve historically voted for the civil rights proponents. Those who promote equality. The good guys. The unconnected. The oppressed. The underdog. Those under unfair attack.
In 2012 Washington State, one thing is becoming more and more abundantly clear.
The LGBT Community is none of the above.
Rex, I hope you’re only venting. The reasons you were voting for gay marriage haven’t changed. You don’t know me, but do it for people like me. Do it for the real gay friends you have in your life who are counting on you. You’re still voting for the good guys. Don’t let a group of kids ruin this for us.
It doesn’t happen very often, but every now and then, a reply takes me by surprise. It makes me think. A small glimmer of hope in a seemingly-endless sea of shit.
This was one of those times.
I lack proper Straight Guy Analogies, so I guess I’ll go with “this is like punishing the whole team because of the one asshole who was cheating.” I don’t live in WA, probably never will, but I know precedent matters, and denying a whole bunch of people equal rights because of one moron is a wrong for a wrong.
I don’t think whatever aggressive primate wrote that screed realizes there is no legal punishment for having bigoted opinions.
The Defense of Marriage website actually has an official statement that those who don’t agree “will be punished for their beleifs”? seriously?
I agree. I think that most everything political in this country, and some not so political, has gotten so divisive and hateful that it’s almost impossible that anyone be allowed to respectfully disagree.
That said, I do hope that you not allow this one group to taint an entire community. I have many friends that would be affected by the passage of this, and they are just trying to live their lives in peace, with their partners and families, and they do not stand for that kind of bitchy intolerance.
I hear you, and I appreciate the food for thought.
You know, I understand the “one bad apple” thing, and that’s why it’s taken me so long to get to where I am. The problem is, I’m not so sure that it’s just one bad apple anymore. Or even a few bad apples.
I mean, did anyone in the gay community come out and say “we respect the needle’s decision, thanks for helping us out last year”, during the Space Needle thing? If they did, I didn’t hear it.
Has anyone in the LGBT community come out and said “The Stranger doesn’t speak for us on this hate group matter, nor does the tenant”?
Here on the Hill at least, when the “community” claims to take a position, rarely do you hear another member of the community speak up and say “uh, no we don’t”. I see very, very, very little diversity of thought anywhere up here. You can see this for yourself when you pick up The Stranger and see the same position taken by writer after writer after writer after writer. It’s about as diverse as a carton of milk.
It’s easy to write this stuff off as the rantings of a few Capitol Hill bigots, but I’ve got to tell you, it can feel pretty damn absolute at times.
I’d like to think that not every gay Seattleite is as bigoted as the rags that claim to speak for them, but if that is the case, it sure would be nice to hear from them every now and then. If only to know that yes, they do exist. Hell, even 1% would be enough to give us some hope. I don’t even see that, though.
When bigots and extremists have taken over the face of a cause, it’s almost unconscionable to let it go unchallenged.
I feel that this is exactly what has happened in recent years, though.
I’m a middle-aged gay man who lives on Beacon Hill. It would never have dawned on me to explicitly say that the Stranger doesn’t speak for me, or this tenant person doesn’t speak for me, because (1) I’ve never even heard of this incident until now and (2) even if I had, I would never imagine that either person or group has the right to speak for me, or that others would think they do. I haven’t read the Stranger in years. If I had to make a statement every time I disagreed with them or the Seattle Gay News or some other local organization with regard to same-sex politics and culture, I would be a very busy person.
Not all of Washington State’s gay population lives on Capitol Hill, or plays on Capitol Hill, or in other ways associates with Capitol Hill. I have dozens of friends in same-sex couples, all over the city, all over the region, all over the state. Most of them are middle-aged, some of them are quite elderly. Most of them have little to no idea or interest in what goes on among the youth of Capitol Hill, or in papers like the Stranger. Certainly none of them would imagine that the youth of Capitol Hill or the editors of Capitol Hill-based newspapers they read are their representatives. My friends in Spokane and Walla Walla wouldn’t even know what the Stranger is. These are the people who most need the legal protections of this bill. For some of them, the possibility of marrying legally is the fulfillment of a life long dream that they never imagined would ever come true. I ask you with all my heart, please please please don’t vote against their dreams because of some clueless young people who haven’t lived through what they have.
Having just re-read your post, I want to make one thing explicit that I only left implicit in my past comment. Everyone I know who has lived through the trenches of the struggle for gay rights for decades is as grateful for the support of our straight allies as ever, and as honored by it. We may not be the people you bump into while socializing on Capitol Hill, or hear from through the editorial board of the Stranger. Most of us are too busy balancing jobs and kids and mortgages and so forth to be out partying or to always be writing letters. But we are out there and we are grateful, truly humbly grateful at the work countless straight allies have done to make our cause understood to others. Thank you all.
The gays are just women with dicks or strap-ons. Like women they are demanding more rights that they just don’t warrent or deserve. The media loves them though so they get more and more attention while the plight of american males are silenced and forgotten. Rex knows whats what and is the only one brave enough to say it. You should all be better by taking heed because he’s only warning you of whats coming.
The gays are just women with dicks or strap-ons. Like women they are demanding more rights that they just don’t deserve. The media loves them though so they get more and more attention while the plight of real american males are silenced and forgotten. Rex knows what’s what and is the only one brave enough to say it. You would all be wise to take heed as he’s only warning you about what’s coming and what your at risk of losing.
Hmmm…. that’s odd, bobgreysr…. I don’t recall Rex ever saying that gays don’t deserve rights….
It’s true, he did say that he wasn’t going to vote for their rights… but that seems like it’s more out of frustration, the same frustration that I, a gay man, feel, than it is out of a desire to disenfranchise anyone.
And another interesting thing i note is the use of the phrase “real american males.”
That seems like a rather ignorant and hateful thing to say, don’t you think? By generalizing the low levels of masculinity found in many gay men, you’re making it hard for gay men like me, one that you would think a “real american male” unless you knew any better.
I play sports. Soccer, football, baseball, most sports, actually.
I don’t go shopping with my besties. I usually go shopping alone just to buy any new clothes I may need for whatever reason.
I don’t parade around in feather boas or drag.
And that probably covers the majority of your prejudice.
You see, sir, your ignorant generalizations are wrong.
Now, running the risk of sounding as ignorant and juvenile as you do, you are an asshole. Plain and simple.
With that, I end my argument. Try not to slip on the gay population’s hair product and body oil on the way out, you bigoted, ignorant, “real american male.”
Ha ha ha you just proved Rex’s point about how intolerant you supposedly tolerant people are! I didn’t call you names but you sure came back with calling me ones! Just because I have opposing viewpoints doesn’t make me a bigot and just because you play soccer or football it doesn’t make you a man.
This article is so refreshing. Hopefully a wake up call to reign in the militant intolerance. I guess once you completely demonize those who disagree with you it’s that much easier to break out the pitchforks. This reminds me of the Daily Show’s recent investigation of “tolerance” at the DNC convention.
Such is the way of all activists.
Will the hatred of all ignorant rednecks ever be eliminated?
Will men and women ever be equal?
Will the stigmas and stereotypes associated with races ever be eradicated from popular thought?
The answer to all of these is obviously no. We do not live in a perfect world. People are pack animals born with an “us or them” mentality and the best that an activist can hope for is to improve their standing in society.
So women can now vote and take high paying jobs. At least one “white guilt” movie is made every couple of years. And most thinking people see no reason why homosexuals shouldn’t be able to marry.
Is it enough? When will it be? How much money will it take to cure breast cancer? When will minorities have enough rights or be properly repaid for the injustice of the past? If there never comes a time when you can declare victory and live in peace is it any wonder that the oppressed simply become the new oppressor? The new hate? The new bigotry? The new “us” with the moral high ground simply giving “them” what they deserve.
And just as Susan Komen has no incentive to cure breast cancer, the Defense of Marriage and other “non-profits” stand much to lose by declaring victory. Will they just close their doors when the fight is over or create just enough hate to keep the donations coming?
I support any fight for equal rights, but the goal now seems to be a new social order and that is another thing entirely.
P.S. I’m having a hard time finding that quote. can you post a link for it. With a google search I see conservatives using that quote but no source for where it actually came from.
I’m going to make the same point others have made, but in a less touchy-feely way. (Ed – I mean that in the best possible way). You’re being incredibly myopic (read: Capitol-Hill-centric). It shows throughout your post, when you equate Washington State’s entire gay community with Capitol Hill: “The Washington State LGBT Community…[is]…vile…[and]…the pampered people of Capitol Hill should know better”). And when you say that the Seattle LGBT community is generally “far more affluent.” No. The small percentage of gays who are able to settle on Capitol Hill are far more affluent. But guess what? Fewer than 5% of the same–sex couples in Washington State live on Capitol Hill.* It doesn’t seem like you have much idea what life is like for those other 95%. And this is a law for all of Washington State, not for Capitol Hill.
Capitol Hill is where 20-something hipsters—straight and gay—live in apartments and party. Some hang on through their 30s, but most grow up, start a family, and settle down. Those who who linger on on Capitol Hill are a highly select bunch, generally those who can afford the extremely high house (and increasingly condo) prices. The rest move to West Seattle, Tukwila, Burien, etc. And of course those are just the locals – believe it or not, there are gay people in Yakima, and Spokane, and Othello, and Wenatchee, and every other city and town in this state.
The Stranger is a rag read by those 20-something Seattle hipsters, and perhaps some of those aging gays who live on Capitol Hill too. It represents the 20-something hipster viewpoint, which has never been known to have a deep perspective on history. And it loves nothing more than to drum up controversies in order to increase readership.
Somehow you’ve decided that the goings-on of Capitol Hill hipsters and the rantings of the Stranger represent the official voices of the entire LGBT community of Washington State. A completely false assumption, and one that only someone who lives in the tiny bubble that is Capitol Hill could come up with.
Of course for a group of people this large and diverse there is no official voice. And just as with any other minority group, just because a member of that group claims to speak for all others doesn’t mean they do. And it doesn’t mean all the other members have to keep saying they don’t. I used to do that. I assure you – it gets f*in’ tiring really fast. Are you White? When’s the last time you explicitly publicly denounced any of the White supremacist groups in this country? Why not?
In terms of this specific issue, the closest thing to an actual “spokesgroup” would be the Approve 74 campaign group Washington United for Marriage (which, notably, is not headquartered on Capitol Hill). On the whole I’d say they run a very positive campaign, and haven’t gotten distracted from that by getting involved in stupid turf wars with rags like the Stranger who mostly want to make themselves seem more important than they are in order to gain readers.
Go ahead and vote against same-sex marriage. But if same-sex marriage is something you actually support, and you’re just voting against it to spite some of your stupid neighbors, then I’d say you’re on about the same moral plane as someone who would have voted in the 1960s in favor of redlining for all Blacks, because, well, the Black Panthers use some inappropriate methods, and the rest of the Black community doesn’t constantly fall over themselves to distance themselves from the Black Panthers. Who knows, maybe you would have done that too. Either way, to me it seems like you’re just adding another loop to the downward spiral of spite.
Perhaps this makes me intolerant of your decision to be intolerant of your neighbors’ intolerance. So be it.
* I calculated this from 2010 Census Data, obtained from:
http://seattletimes.com/html/localnews/2015813789_census04m.html
http://seattletimes.com/flatpages/local/2010censussamesexcouples.html
http://o.seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/localnews/2016337632_gaycouples28m.html
What Steve said.
I don’t know much about “Capitol Hill,” but I think I do know a thing or two about Rex from reading him for so about six years now.
I can not help but wonder why he decided to move into an area filled with militant gays, trend-worshippers, and young people who think now is the most amazing/important time in history because they’ve never lived through anything else. That’s the kind of area where groupthink is high, enabling mass stupidity and decisions like “I wouldn’t use anything but an Apple because I wouldn’t want my friends to see me using something that isn’t an Apple.”
Heyas, Rex.
I do enjoy your articles, but I never commented because I had nothing interesting to say, until now.
I understand your concern that many gays out there are very pushy about this “tolerance” thing. I’m a gay and even I feel annoyed too sometimes. But I personally know several gay guys in Seattle who are moderate, and they’re nowhere near that noisy about this bill.
There are several reasons you never see them in real life. Some of them are gamers, tech-geeks, musicians, or artists who spend most of their time online, inside their locked rooms. Also, you wouldn’t even be able to tell they’re gays, because they don’t prance around like drag-queens in speedos or shout out about their sexuality. They’re completely fine with it, and they feel like there’s no reason to keep talking about it.
I don’t even live in WA, but I do feel like it’s necessary to write down my thoughts here. I hope you will reconsider your vote. There are many awesome people out there, just like you, who will benefit from whatever-gender marriage.